Ladylike tribal nails

A pretty pale pink base colour with some skinny line graphic designs is bit of an unexpected combination, but I likes it!

I freehanded the black over the pink using a nail art pen, and unfortunately the pattern bled slightly in places when I then applied top coat.

I'll admit I did freak out initially at the blurring of my perfectly neat lines, but hey. Once I keep my hand at arm's length (which human anatomy has made rather easy) it doesn't bother me, and I think the overall effect is still pretty great.

Products used
CND Vinylux Cake Pop
Black nail art pen
CND Vinylux top coat

Going dotty for nude nails

I don't know why I keep trying to wear putty coloured neutrals, because they're a nightmare to get right with my pale but sallow skin. (Of course, that's exactly why I revisit them again and again: in a futile quest to find one that really suits me.) I don't usually blog about these failures (so unphotogenic) but thought I'd show you my latest attempt anyway. While it didn't look quite this Dead Hands in person, it certainly wasn't my most flattering mani ever.

Still, if a more skin-friendly nude shade was involved I think these randomly placed and sized white dots would make for some cute, subtle, and eminently DIYable nail art.

I just put a small amount of white polish on some tin foil and then used a double-ended dotting tool to apply. Simples!

Products used
CND Vinylux Svelte Suede
CND Vinylux Cream Puff
CND Vinylux top coat

SPOTTED: Your next pair of shoes

I saw these roarsome beauties over the weekend and would have pounced there and then if the shop had had my size. They didn't, of course, but these New Look leather loafers shot to the top of my mental shoe wish list (a real thing I actually do) faster than a leopard going full tilt after its noms.

Here are five reasons they should be on yours, too.

ONE // As evidenced by the London and New York AW13 shows, animal prints are OMGSOHOTRIGHTNOW. That goes double for anything snake or leopard print.

TWO // The loafer shape means they're as comfortable and chic and go-with-everything as ballet flats, just heaps cooler.

THREE // The leopard print upper is actually hairy. Looks all expensive and that.

FOUR // Priced at just £24.99/€29.99, they won't break the bank.

FIVE // We can be shoe twins. I am totally ordering a pair!

I got ninety-nine problems and the fireplace is one

There is a problem with our new flat. I mean, there is definitely more than just one problem, but I'm trying to only fixate on one at a time so that my head doesn't explode.

Today's most pressing problem: the great big huge fugly fireplace.

I bet Jay-Z doesn't have to put up with this crap.

The fireplace is very nearly as tall as me and wider than my wingspan, which would be alright if it was a thing of beauty but this is a great hulk of overbearing brown and black and purple, like an angry bruise in fire-surround form, complete with broken corners, a badly scuffed black and grey hearth, and a piddly little faux-brass gas fire that looks lost in its cavernous depths.

It is probably my least favourite thing about the whole place; apart from the fact that it's so unchangeable and undisguisable, it's out of keeping with the rest of the flat and dominates the living room completely.

I thought adding a giant mirror above it would help to pull focus so I bought this one, which is very similar to a now discontinued Graham & Green multi-faceted mirror that I've been lusting after for about the last 6 years.

I thought all those angled mirrored panels would be better than a plain mirror which would just reflect the kitchen cabinets opposite (they're another problem, but we won't get into it now) and in that respect, the mirror works nicely. It's just that, despite its massive size (120cm x 80cm) it still looks kind of weeny on the giant mantle.

Oh, and it pulls focus to the bloody fireplace, which it looks quite mad on top of.

GAH. Hopefully I'll be able to return it and brainstorm a different solution to the fireplace conundrum. Ideally one that actually works to make the damn thing look less hideous.

At least my For Like Ever print is still looking as reliably awesome as ever, despite its puncture wounds. LUV U, poster x